Do I have to compromise on my ambition to be happy?

This is a conversation starter, I am positively sure that a lot of people these days feel like there is no in between, you either become a highly driven, widely known, career person or you lead a simple and happy life.

Lets face it, if you want to live the fancy life and brand yourself, you have to utilize the over exposure trend surrounding us, or you have to work extra, extra hard to be a part of the unbelievably fast and competitive corporate world.

The days of the happy, content middle class seem long behind us and an unreachable fantasy in the 2020s.

Every day I face this struggle, I really want to be happy, but I don’t see myself fit for this era’s success style, I can’t advertise and cash on my mere existence as everybody seems to be doing.

I wish I was born at a time when you could only be famous if you have a remarkable talent, when you had to put pen to paper and write a book if you want to share your thoughts with the world, when you had to buy the newspaper to know who’s who.

This digital world with its endless parade of pretentious over achievers is taking its toll in me, and I can only imagine what it’s doing to people of a younger age and more impressionable personalities.

I wake up everyday wishing that I was enough, that I would be content and happy just getting by.. and it’s not that I despise ambition, on the contrary, I value ambition so much that I can’t live without it, what I am wishing for is being able to find the ambition I could achieve or pursuit while living normally not working 18hrs a day or compromising my values.

Too much to ask for in this day and age?



Self loathing

Today, for the first time maybe ever, I loath my self.

As I write this word I taste how ugly it is, how it’s was never a part of my vocabulary, how I am used to putting all kinds of difficulties and emotions in writing, but never had I ever used a term like this.

And what’s interesting is that feeling does not come from a place of immense failure, nor does it come from a deep guilt or wrong doing, it simply comes from two crisp smart phone notifications I received in within hours of each other.

The first was saying that the license of my two year old business, and the other is from this site itself, it’s the subscription renewal from WordPress!

Why would these regular insignificant and hundred percent predictable notifications bring me to my breaking point? why would they in all their innocence make loath myself?

Since I could remember, I always had great ideas, I am no Einstein by any means of course, but you know, I have had decent sense of logic, imagination and thoughts anyone who heard it was impressed. However, I simply never followed up on any.

But whenever it comes to doing the actual work, putting the effort and most importantly, the commitment, I slag and revert to my procrastinating lazy self.

In this article I will not be preaching a solution, I will not give reasons and justifications, I will not even address the feeling or try to comfort myself or process it in my brain.

Today i will only admit, that I am a person who has let herself down, and it’s not our of lack of ability, just out of habit, and this habit will break.

My first step will be committing to documenting this habit breaking journey here in my personal blog.

Something inside me is already telling me you will fail, but I will put my fingers on this keyboard everyday from now on, and we’ll see.


And I know I am more determent this time because hey, it’s only 20 days till new year, but I will not wait for new year’s resolutions, I am starting now! So close to the satisfaction of starting on Jan,1st!


Overcoming “phone” anxiety

Anxiety, unfortunately, manifests in many shapes and forms, and it never ceases to amaze me with its versatility πŸ˜’

One of the most recent encounters I had with anxiety was with the newly discovered form of it, the “phone” anxiety. I had always thought I was just shy or lazy before realizing the amount of struggle I was going through with a simple mundane task, and confessing to myself that it’s not normal to go through hell every time my phone rings or more yet every time I have to make a phone call.

And just to keep things clear, I am not an introvert, I don’t find it hard to talk to people, I love dealing with strangers, and I do so well in meetings, so this type of struggle was strictly related to my phone.

*How did I recognize I had “phone anxiety”:

1- As I work somewhat in the business/client relations area, making phone calls with people both unknown or totally familiar to me is a daily thing, when I started jeopardizing my work just to avoid a phone call, I had to step back and do research about it.

2- When answering a call from a person I do miss and do want to speak to was incomprehensibly hard.

3- Fast heart rate was a huge indicator that no one can miss, having your heart beating as if you were running for the past 20 minutes just because you have to make a phone call is not that common.

4- Being ready to do anything else to avoid a few minutes on the phone, even if it’s going to take triple the amount of time and effort.

5- Having the same symptoms in all different situations: at first you tell yourself it’s because I am tired now but I will be at ease some other time//It’s this particular person I don’t like to have a call with// it’s because I don’t know what I should say exactly// …etc. However, my feeling didn’t change over time and I ran out of reasons to justify my struggle.

Now we get to the overcoming part, honestly for me once I identified the issue as it is “a diagnosed anxiety form” I was half way through overcoming it.

So the tips that really helped me and proved effective are:

1- Diagnosing the problem and doing some research.

2- Setting a purpose for the call in your mind, for example, if you are calling someone for work at least have a specific reason for the call so you would feel less dizzy about it.

3- Practice the opening sentence, look at the time, is it “Good morning, Good afternoon or ..”, this might seem ridiculous but believe me thinking of what to say after the person answers if you are making the call is enough to throw you off balance when you have anxiety, and it will make the experience register in your mind as an overwhelming task.

4- Don’t worry about what happens after the greetings and stating the purpose of the call, lets say I call a client, I have to know that I will be saying: “Hello …., Good afternoon, I want to ask you about ….” what comes after is not to worry about, if I know what am doing getting through these 3 lines is all the trouble, and this for me was actually better than practicing the entire conversation, because the rest of the call will depend on the other person’s answer and if that doesn’t go by the script you have practiced it might be worst for your anxiety.

5- This is the one that helped me the most, not just helped, it healed me and made me capable of making and receiving phone calls with some ease, it’s knowing and constantly reminding myself that the person on the other line, no matter who he/she/.. is, is just another human being!

They might have the same thoughts you have, they might be tired or overwhelmed, they might even be stressed about what to say to you!

So take it easy on yourself, remember, the worse that could happen is you messing up with some words or coming across as nervous, and that is FINE. There is not one professional, working person in the world that doesn’t find this relatable, and if it’s not a professional and you are just making a social call then remember being who you are and taking things light-heartedly always makes it better.


Entitlement vs Individuality – how to find balance in self worth, instead of self centerness

Entitlement is a word we are getting more and more familiar with each day, is it just another word for stigmatizing individuality or is it the new age disease we need to stop ourselves from indulging in, in order to be who we aspire to be!

Let me start by saying, individuality is one of the most amazing concepts we ‘as humans’ have came up with, IMO. It has allowed people to be creative, free thinking, self caring and unique in their expressions.

The era where you have to comply to every template of your society is long gone, fortunately. you are who you are, with your beautiful differences an unique imprint.

Knowing our self worth as individuals, our rights and ,our needs is the one of the best things we can do in our short lives. However, with the rise of social media “the great platform that has done so much good to the world as a collective and to deserving individuals”, a new method of marketing has emerged, and it is called “self branding”.

Self branding has become almost inevitable if you want to put your work out there, and 100% inevitable if you want to make fast money.

I have the biggest respect and admiration to all the amazing technologies we have, but that doesn’t stop me from thinking we have lost the ability to be recognized for pure talent, innovation or even hard work.

Self branding do take hard work, I am not about to trash it, the thing is, it shouldn’t be the most important thing of all, it should be the cherry on top. Say I fined a great product, find out the person behind this product is someone interesting. That would be the icing on the cake. On the other hand, the self branding mania has become the whole cake and the good product/input is barely the icing.

People have found out that you can advertise yourself, make yourself look interesting, and then you can sell whatever you can come up with (or hire people to come up with), it doesn’t have to be a good product/content, you will get the money flowing because you have become the brand, you are no longer the brand’s face, you are the brand itself, and this sounds a bit of a disturbing way to practice individuality, as it is merchandising the person itself.

Now, why is this connected to entitlement? If you don’t have the environment that could keep you centered, this loud, raging roar of the self branding movement could get to your head, and it could be morphed into entitled behavior.

The complete focus on individuals for their sheer existence and self promotions rather than for their human worth and their input to the world, has made us all comparing ourselves to these people who became so easily famous for no particular talent or for something anyone do in their daily life.

We used to think people become rich and famous for being an amazing artist, a great thinker, a hardworking business genius, or for giving giving their time and sources for greater good. and that was OK, that motivated teenagers with high ambitions to search for their hidden talent, to study hard, to try small investments, to practice for sports, learn programming, look for an invention ideas… etc.

Now young people are seeing that they can become rich and famous by binge eating in front of the camera, taking lots of selfies or playing pranks on each others.

Again, I am not trying to trash who does that, I am just trying to say it has been the leap we took as a community from individuality and self worth, to entitlement and self branding.

Why entitlement? because when we feel we are entitled to fame and easy money because people just like us are getting it almost effortlessly, we start to believe we are entitled to everything in life with no effort.

  • Is it bad to feel entitled to have a good quality of life? Definitely not, that aspiration one of our basic human rights.
  • Is it bad to feel entitled to get what we want all the time, effortlessly? Yes, it’s bad, and most of all, it’s bad for you.

Entitled attitude might be annoying for others, the sales/service worker will be annoyed by a highly demanding and not so highly polite customer, the overall community will sniff that act and find it a bit repelling, but these will not be the true damages of entitlement.

The true damage of entitlement will happen within your mind itself, and will take it’s toll on the quality of life you want in the end.

I have noticed a while back that I am being frustrated with everything I do, not content with any of my achievements for the past few years, even though I had reached a place in life I was previously hoping to reach.

As a person who is totally committed to facing my mental and psychological issues with all I have, I started looking for the source of this lack of content.

I found out that I have been crossing the line between knowing my self worth and the feeling entitled, even though I have not acted entitled, not with anyone in my life and I don’t think anyone would see that in me “hopefully”, the feeling have sneaked inside of my head and crippled my happiness, I was conscious enough to not act on it, but not conscious enough to stop it from damaging me internally.

I felt I was entitled to much more things for much less hard work, I felt I was entitled to be acknowledged even though I haven’t done anything remarkable, and it was because I saw people around me getting it all effortlessly.

The decision I took to fight this feeling inside me was almost life saving, saving me from frustration.

You are entitled to love and be loved, you are entitled to be yourself, to have a voice, to have freedom of choice, to have a decent life and be treated with respect of your humanity and to not be subjected to prejudice.

You are entitled to a lot of things, but you are not entitled to treat people based on your mood, you are not entitled to treat people with attitude, you are not entitled to go through life effortlessly to reach the “lifestyle”you think everybody on Instagram has, relax, you are missing nothing, it’s all for advertisement. Your life is satisfying in all it’s magnificent details, with all the people who love you, with all the beauty and uniqueness you posses, stop falling for the lie of that lifestyle we are pushed to believe it’s the only way to live, remember being grateful and count your blessings, not for any reason but your own happiness and satisfaction, go back to the mentality of discovering your hidden talent or having the drive to work hard to reach your goals, self branding money comes with it’s perks and also it’s cost, and believe me, appreciating yourself for who you are is much more satisfying than privilege.

Almost failing from the start – myself, my spouse and perfectionism in a marriage

Less than 20 hours after the self loathing realisation and setting a goal to my self tow rite an article here every day, I almost forgot, almost failed from the start and called it quits..

However, here I am writing whatever is on my mind, at this moment, it’s about my spouse, and me, and perfectionism!

I used to say there is an 80/20 percent rule for choosing your life partner, no body is perfect 100%, so if you find someone that’s 80% good, you have to not focus on the missing 20%, because if you fixate on that 20% and try to find it somewhere else you most probably will lose the 80% you already have.

As most people show the best side of them and you don’t see the wrongs till you know them very well, kind of like when you first meet someone.. all people you see you are seeing the beginning phase from, only the ones you actually stay with you will get to know their faults. And that’s what happens when you require your spouse to be perfect.

However, and even though I know all of the above, people don’t always practice what they preach, and I find myself focusing on the bits that annoy me or that are not perfect in my husband’s behaviour and almost toxicating our relationship or in a more dramatic phrasing, staining our love.

Now that I have shared this with myself at least, I will try to dial down the pursuit of perfection howling inside of my brain, will pull up my scale again (you shouldn’t judge people by a scale I know but this is just a metaphor), I will cast a semi blind eye as much as I can on the things that are not wrong yet not perfect, if I could be a totally non judgemental person with everyone on earth (and I am), why couldn’t I be that with my romantic partner?

Ill not dwell on the why, will act on it, and try to succeed.

Another exciting aspect of this personal journey..


Why we should de-stigmatize opinion changing and make change our only routine!

Changing and routine in the same sentence! if that sounds weird to you, then you should proceed to finish the following.

I think it’s fair to say that most of us have been brought up to believe in a set of principles that are unchanging, undoubted and somehow sacred.

Most of us have felt that people who change their views or opinions are two-faced or hypocrites. and even though this might be true on some occasions, it can not be further from truth in others.

Lets say i have a person in my life that always acts extra nice and pretends to be a good friend, while talking behind my back and hating me at the same time, and I can’t stress enough the same time part enough, I can fairly think that this person is a hypocrite. But lets back up and say this person have been a genuine friend to me for a period of time, thinking I was a person they can trust and relate to, and then proceeded to change their mind and discover I am not as good of a person as they thought i was, simply stopped being my friend and expressed their opinion of me. I would not be fair to call them two-faced for simply changing their opinion.

Now consider that for everything in our lives, yes some undoubted values will always be stable, hurting other living things will never be acceptable, lying and stealing, bullying and racism will never be subjected to opinions, it’s always bad and no one can change my mind on it, but every other aspect in our life could very well be a matter of opinion.

Why can’t I like a politician for the good work he/she has done in the past few years and proceed to unlike them because they started to become corrupt, why should I be called a hypocrite for changing my stands on the situation, I have had this struggle with so many of my friend, all smart, intellectual and kind-hearted people, that are very afraid to admit they have changed their minds upon new found information and facts, thinking that change of heart will make them branded as hypocrites for not standing behind the same party till death.

My best friend of 15 years recently got me thinking of this again, we have known each other for a long time, been through everything together, cried about the same things and pursued similar ambitions. I have had to confront her recently to tell her that she is not changing! we usually confront others for changing, but somehow when we evolve or change (which is the natural course of life) we are not able to confront our life partners that they haven’t, we just say we grew apart and walk away, that’s why college friends never see each other again and once very much in love couples split.

I cared too much about my friend that I did not want to grow out of our friendship, and I told her she is not changing! we can not cry about the same things we used to cry about in high school, we can not speak of the exact same worries we had. she had lost many people from her life because of that, they just stopped caring for the same things and therefor stopped caring for her, if she had changed to the worse, they would have confronted her, if she had changed they would have called her out, but she didn’t change, she is still the same person we once enjoyed being with, so they were not able to blame her, they thought they shouldn’t admit that they have changed (as if this was a bad thing, the stigma!) and she was left wondering what went wrong and made her dear close friends walk away while she is trying to remain the exact same person.

Why can’t I search for financial security in my 20s and then find out I was chasing a dead end for me and start searching for learning experiences instead of fixed income in my 30s, or go the other way around.

Photo by Chris Lawton on Unsplash

It has become a bad word we use to brand someone as if they have commited a crime, You have changed, we say with disappointment and disgust, as if a person we have known for a few years is not allowed to change, they have to stop evolving and growing, they should stand still in the phase we met them in.

When it’s sometimes meant to incline bad behavior, it is too commonly used that it’s becoming a stigma we hand out and fear to hear for ourselves.

A human should change, personally I have noticed a pattern in somehow, that I am never the same person I was 5 years ago, and at first I was scared, but now I realize that is a good thing. 5 years ago Haya was not able to communicate with her parents, she was not as resilient to life obstacles and she had read less books and had less work/life experience.

A lot of the ideas i have strongly believed in 5 or 10 years ago have proved themselves wrong or in complete, and I am proud to say I have changed my mind on many of them, I struggled at first thinking I wasn’t staying true to my old self, but now I feel proud of this ability to change, and I accept that I have changed, admit that I had some inaccurate opinions, and may have inaccurate opinions now, and that I might change it in a few years.

As long as I am staying true to being a good human, not hurting others, not damaging the world and not breaking the law, I will fight for my right to keep on evolving as a person and changing my mind on any subject when new information about it comes to light, as long as that change of mind is happening from within and relaying on facts and rational thinking.

Films of human value you need to see from 2019

As a movie loving person, or a cinema geek to be honest, the movies of 2019 have been delightfully surprising.

After a couple of years being not the greatest in cinema history, IMO, and many of my movie enthusiastic friends’ opinions.

2019 has delivered some films of great substance, along with quality execution.

I could go on and on for a hundred pages talking about films and cinema, but I will restrain myself and use my focus recollecting techniques, check out https://findingbalance519182823.wordpress.com/2020/01/12/loosing-focus-5-fast-and-easy-tips-to-collect-and-redirect-your-thoughts/ and only write about the point I had in mind for this article.

Among the many beautiful films of 2019, the following ones have managed to touch the deepest of emotions inside of me, as a human being, as a woman, or as someone searching for some balancing thoughts:

1- Togo, lets start nice and cozy with the amazing Disney film, that did not get the proper acknowledgement and publicity. it is the amazing story of a pack of dogs, strong, loyal and magnificent, saving human lives, Togo is the perfect film if you wanna experience a full range of emotions and enjoy your time in the process.

2- The two popes, this movie has the best of all, the rich scenario, the insightful discussions, the well crafted and well presented characters, some historical facts and the song “Dancing Queen” by ABBA.

The delightful real life/cinema blending is the cherry on top of the decadent sundae that is this film, do not skip on it, it really is worth watching on every aspect.

3- Bombshell, this film is also under-rated. Aside from being based on a true story of corporate world, as a woman, I felt like I want to make everybody I know watch it and try to put themselves in these women’s shoes. Sexual harassment is much more than physical discomfort, it is distressing in every way, and yes, even though “some” times a woman has the choice of saying No and walking away, she should not have to make that choice in the first place.

It’s horrible enough to face the choice between professional growth, between everything you dreamed of and worked hard for and the ability to say no.

To be objectified and held back from your potentials is bad enough. When the Hollywood movement against sexual harassment first started, I have to confess, after hearing some stories I thought to myself, well you had all the choice to say no, you chose the fame and money. I regret having that idea even for a second, after seeing Bombshell I realized it’s not only about fame and money, it’s your ambition, your years of hard work and studying, your family’s quality of life.. etc.

We might have the ability to walk away in some cases, but we should not be in that position, we should not have to walk away from everything we accomplished or endure being objectified and distressed.

If you are not planning on seeing a big number of movies, please start with these 3, they are not just beautiful cinema, they are also nourishment for the soul and mind.

And if you are interested in films and movies, follow this blog as I don’t think I will stop writing about it anytime soon😁

Losing Focus – 5 fast and easy tips to collect and redirect your thoughts

Ironically enough, I wrote this title a few days ago, and every time I told myself I will start writing what’s on my mind on the subject, I just did something else!

Is it my mind’s way of telling me you are the last person to talk about focus πŸ˜…

Well, shushing my thoughts and going ahead with writing this is something I will do as part of the solution to my “loosing focus” issue and as a proof that my tips do work..

I have found that discarding all pop-up ideas and completing what you have in hand in spite of all the distractions is the best way to tackle this.

So here are the best techniques I use when my mind wanders away from my sunject of focus:

1- take 1 minute to just clear your mind and dismiss any thoughts before trying to focus on a particular one, you need a clean slate for the idea you want to focus on to be printed on.

Do a breathing exercise, or just simply take some regular deep breaths, you can doodle for a minute as a way of emptying your mind, walk or jump in your place, it all helps, but most importantly take all the time you need to reach that state of a clear mind, it may take you 2 minutes or 3, not so much longer than that if you are in a regular state.

2- After clearing your mind, put a clear title or heading in you mind, of the thing you need to focus on.

Just a heading, no details, fill up that clean slate you have created with the ambiance of whatever you want.

e.g. if you want to focus on work, get yourself in the mood for work before focusing on the detailed matter, sit straight, put on your glasses if you use them, put that perfume you use on a daily basis to work as the sense of smell helps connecting the thoughts and setting the mood in a big way.

3- After getting in the right atmosphere, start dragging the particular idea to your mind, don’t rush your brain into overdrive, let it work on its own pace, as I have found that trying to figure out something very fast turns into a long process, while launching your brain in slow speed and taking breathers to let the thoughts set and organize itself will actually turn out to be faster in the end.

4- Don’t say “all or nothing”, if you find it hard to process some topic or solve a problem or finish a project in one sitting, that may be because it’s not a one sitting project, don’t say am not able to focus enough right now, I will leave it aside and get back to do it all at once in full speed once I have my undivided attention.

That is shooting yourself in the foot, and believe me, this knowledge comes from experience. I have turned my feet into a strainer when it comes to shooting my self in the foot with that resolution.

If you are not focused enough to do the whole thing, just do whatever the amount your mind is capable of doing at the moment. Don’t say “all or nothing”, “something” is fine for now.

5- Drink water! and no this is not a trivial addition to the subject, this is vital in this case, and not because drinking water is healthy, it’s because sometimes when you loose focus you are dehydrated, and you need old plain water.

A simple glass of water will do miracles in terms of focus and waking the brain up. Coffee does not count, nor tea or soft drinks, not even juices.. just try plain water and you will most definitely know what I am talking about.

Finding balance in the horrible start of 2020 – 6 tips to avoid empathy burnout

Let’s be clear, this is one of the most depressing “year starts” in many people’s lives.

I am not about to list the terrifying and heartbreaking incidents happening on this planet at this moment, however, as many others, I am thinking about the contribution I can make to help.

No matter how small and insignificant it may seem, and after donating whatever I could manage to the much deserving, I wanted to share something with the sensitive people, the logical ones, the great numbers of human beings who are not able to digest all the information of environmental catastrophe, scary political madness and individual human tragedies.

One of the hardest things to do in this era of time is to find balance between feeling the required empathy, and not being emotionally drained and mentally stressed.

Photo by Mitchell Luo on Unsplash
Photo by Mitchell Luo on Unsplash

PS: this is aimed to help overly sensitive and empathetic people, those kind souls that are sensitive to the point of self damaged, you are not alone.

5 Tips to avoid stress and depression in this crucial time:

1- Don’t feel guilty about self-care:

You need to be calm, logical, emotionally stable, optimistic and internally healed, in order to be able to help others.

That’s why you need to shake off the guilt, the first thing you need to tell yourself is that this is not your fault. yes the same way you tell a 7 year old child that his/her/their parents’ divorce is not any of their fault.

An empathetic, sensitive person is someone who has the ability to feel from the depth of their heart, doubt themselves, care for what is happening around them, and not able to shrug their shoulders in the face of a neighbor’s or a fellow creature’s distress.

As much as empathy is important and vital, we have to keep it from crippling us, as the people who posses the ability to feel empathy are the ones who do good in this world, you need to take care of yourself while the world needs you the most.

That deep rooted guilt or frustration for knowing you can’t save the planet should be released from your insides. you can save many by being strong and logical and caring, you can’t make the difference you are ought to make if you are weak and depressed.

Take some time for yourself, whether it’s on a yoga mat or with friends or on a nice trip, don’t judge yourself for being at ease when you are doing whatever you can to help.

In conclusion, you want to be proud of your empathy not become a burnout because of it.

Check https://advice.shinetext.com/articles/how-to-protect-yourself-from-empathy-burnout/

2- Small help, small things, small contributions matter:

Those 5 $ you were able to donate this week do matter.

The visit you managed to a care home do matter.

The pet you have rescued do matter.

The long talk you had with a depressed friend do matter.

The helping hand you extended to a family member do matter.

That plastic usage reduction you achieved last month do matter.

EVERY single little thing you do for good do matter, humanity is a like a huge Lego arrangement, every little piece makes difference. you may not be as powerful, as rich, or as influential as others, but the good you do is vital, important and noticeable.

No act of kindness is too small, it’s not worth it to feel depressed for not being able to do more, when you are already doing all you can do. you are fulfilling most of the duty you have as a human, by simply being the best version you can be in terms of kindness, and spreading that kindness around.

3- Find the right crowd to be with:

When you are an overly sensitive person, surrounded by overly sensitive people, it could get a bit overwhelming. on the other hand, when you are an overly sensitive person, existing in a crowd of self-centered, entitled and non caring or superficial people, it could be destructive.

My blog is about finding balance, it’s my new found purpose in life, after years and years of thinking, contemplating, reading and thinking again, the one concept I could relay on to tie up all of my scattered thoughts and messy emotions is Balance, it’s the keyword, the theory of everything for me in this life.

So going back to the crowd issue, balance is what we seek, if you are not in the state of being able to create that balance, then you need to surround yourself with people who provide it.

If I am angry with my husband/friend/sister for something I know I have exaggerated because of my PMS, I don’t go to someone who hypes me up to exaggerate even more, I go to a person who would be calm and rationalize me.

The same thing applies here, if you are overly sensitive, the best cure is being with people who are also sensitive, so they can respect your feelings “not call you a drama queen” for caring about real issues.

But not as overly sensitive as you are, to drag each other through emotional fatigue to the point of reaching empathy burnout.

4- Spend time with pets/children AKA innocent creatures:

No good balanced crowd around. no problem, reach to your pet. you don’t have a pet, get a pet.

Spend time with your children, or any children you feel for if not yours, simply being around an innocent animal or a newborn will provide a much needed calmness. cuddle them, smell them, give them kisses and hold their tiny hands/paws.. you will find peace, you will remember why this world still deserves a chance, and why you need to stay on your feet.

My warm snuggle and stress reliever – Zeus

5- Don’t skip on your personal “new year’s resolutions”:

No need to skip your yearly dose of optimism and that “fresh start” feeling due to global news. maybe you can insert a goal or two relating to making the world a better place, but don’t skip the whole process, and if you don’t usually do it, start now. heck 2020 seems as good as any year, if not better, to have a list of good resolutions and goals. remember:

If you want to change the world, start off by making your bed.

William H. McRaven.

Maybe not your bed per say, just start from the closest place to you, granted, the closest place to me is often my bed.

6- Look up any feeling you are having:

I have struggled with phone anxiety for years, I had trouble speaking on the phone in front of anyone. my heart raced a bit when the phone rang. I will write about this intensively some other time, but for now I am giving an example of something I had and never thought it was out there, diagnosed and many people are familiar with it.

A simple research could not fix the problem of course, you still need healing, but simply knowing it wasn’t something that only exists in my imagination, and not that strange and embarrassing was a huge step for overcoming it.

This is my small contribution for today, my attempt to balance my feelings after the morning “news feed scroll”, which was a huge mistake.

Which reminds me to share with you an additional tip:

Know what you are following on social media, put down the phone for a couple of hours everyday to walk, cook, read, watch a good movie or even nap. whatever you need to have a short escape from the gigantic amount of information we get with each scroll.

You need that more than you think.

Thank you for getting here, and thank you for being a decent human.